Hosting your own tickle gathering is a very real possibility for most people. It takes a little work and communication. But, it’s not impossible. Every other gathering out there started when someone said that they wanted to have something for tickle fans in their own area. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. Most start with just a handful of folks getting together to gab about tickling. Some, like NEST, have grown to a larger size that requires much more time and effort. Those who run those gatherings should be thanked and congratulated. One good way to say thanks to a gathering host for getting the ball rolling is to assist them in their efforts. There are some specific ways you can do so listed at the bottom of this page. (These things also give you an idea of help you may want to ask folks for if you do a gathering of your own.)
This page will explore some things you may want to consider in getting a group started in your area. One thing to keep in mind when looking at having a gathering of your own... This will be your party. It is a private gathering. Unless you decide to do otherwise, people can’t simply decide that they want to come and then show up at your doorstep. You chose the people who will or won’t be there. So, if there are folks who you know and you want to ask them first, great! That’s the best way to start...a private invite to each person on your list of friends in the community. Then, simply go from there.
Here’s a little list of things you can do in preparation for hosting your own gathering...
1. Talk about the idea with one or two friends who will be able and willing to give you a hand.
2. Keep in mind that you need not get fancy or large your first time around.
3. Choose a date and location that will work for you as well as any time restrictions. (A single afternoon is perfectly legit and is actually how the more formal part of most gatherings is done.)
4. Decide on a list of friends you would like to have join in your gathering.
5. Send those folks a personal invitation to come, asking that they RSVP soon enough to open things to others if there’s room and the desire to do so.
6. If you are allowing for others to seek permission to attend after your invites have been responded to, post a notice on community forums and groups to let folks know what your plans are. If you do this, you’ll want to give the following information in that post...
- date and time
- city in which it’s being held (You do NOT want to post the exact location for the general public to see.)
- a contact person
- a deadline they need to respond by (Be sure to give yourself time for the rest of the process.)
- You may also want to point out that room will be limited.
- the per-person cost of the event (You are permitted by law to cover your expenses but not to profit. So, cover the cost of the location, food, drinks and any prizes you may want to have.)
7. Once people start writing with requests to join you, you’ll want to get more info. from them. Here are two things you can now use...
- The form at the bottom of this page can be copied for use in finding out who they are, where they live, etc. You’ll want to assure them that this information will be kept in confidence.
- You should also send them the rules for your gathering at this point and ask that they acknowledge and agree to them.
8. If you’re looking to get a solid local group started, it might be good to work your way through those who are nearby first. Then, as space permits, you can add in others. But, no matter where people are from, if you don’t feel comfortable with them, you are not obligated to accept them. (When in doubt, asking hosts of other gatherings for information is always a viable option. We’re always willing to help.)
9. Arrange for the location, if outside the home. Restaurants are fine for munches but not for play. So, you may want to look at a hotel suite or an adult club with a room you can rent for an afternoon.
10. Once you have your list of people, you’ll need to contact those whom you are not able to welcome. A simple note stating your appreciation of their interest but that you’re out of room is the easiest way to handle this. (There will always be some who are disappointed. But, that’s really not your problem.)
11. Now, you need to contact those who will be coming to give them all the details and take care of business.
- Get their payment of any fee you may need to charge to cover the cost. (Many may prefer a money order to help guard anonymity. It’s your choice whether or not to mess with personal checks. Cash going through the mail is a target and not recommended. It’s your choice whether to accept payment at the door.)
- Give them the exact location and time frame. (Be sure to request that they keep this information to themselves.)
- Give them any contact numbers that could be necessary if they run late or lose their way.
- Pulling up a map of the location area on yahoo (or another online map site) and providing the link is helpful, too.
12. You’ll want to ask a couple of people (preferably with some play experience) to act as monitors to be sure that all play is safe and comfortable for those involved. These people will be the ones to aid the host in enforcing the rules and being sure that boundaries set by lees are not crossed. Be sure that you communicate with these folks in advance to be sure everyone is on the same page with things.
13. If you’re planning on any raffles or door prizes, this is when you’ll want to finish gathering those items. Keep in mind that these are extras that you don’t have to have. But, if you decide that you’d like to have some, that’s cool too. Some web sites are willing to provide prizes. So, don’t be shy about talking to them. Some possible items would be...
- A video purchased from or donated by one of the video companies.
- A copy of one of the MTJ magazines.
- A pre-paid months membership to a pay site
- A disc full of pictures and/or video clips.
- A set of cuffs.
- some tickle toys
14. If you’re planning to provide any food and drink at the gathering, you’ll want to be arranging for that. Here are some things to think about...all assuming that this is a play time...
- be sure to double-check your applications that folks turned in to see if there are any food allergies you need to plan for
- water is an absolute must, since people can get thirsty and even slightly dehydrated during play
- sodas, juices, coffee, tea and milk are all good ideas (don’t forget real and artificial sugar for coffee and tea drinkers)
- snack foods such as chips, cookies and fruit are a good idea to have available
- if you’re going through a meal time, having rolls, meats, cheeses, condiments and a couple of salads is an easy way to feed folks
- ordering pizzas , sandwiches, etc. is an option, but tends to take more time and money
- use disposable materials as much as possible to save on cleanup (paper products are bio-degradable and recommended)
- if the gathering is in a home, preparing something that can be popped in the oven and warmed during play is another possibility, though one that requires a bit more time and planning. (I did two full meals for our first, having to do nothing that day aside from heating things up and sticking a turkey in the oven.)
15. Clean-up is easiest if you’re taking care of things as you go along. Asking folks to be sure to dispose of garbage and keep toys gathered as they go along will go a long way to make it quick and relatively easy. If you’re in a public place that requires you being out at a certain time, be sure to give yourself enough time for this. Setting the end time of the gathering at least a half hour prior to this time will help.
16. Now, sit back, relax and have a drink while you go to the places you announced your event in and post a new thread bragging about what a great gathering you had! ;-)
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Information Request Form for Possible Attendees
(Please print all information so that we’re sure to be able to read it. Thanks!)
1. Are you at least 18 yrs of age? If yes, how old are you? If no, we’re sorry, but we cannot welcome you at this time. (State law requires proof of age in public places. Since we are responsible for our own group, we will check IDs at the door ourselves to keep your anonymity secure.)
2. Do you have ANY health problems or special dietary needs/requests (i.e., food or other allergies, asthma, diabetes, heart condition, blood pressure problems, PTSD, etc.) that we should be aware of?
3. Do you take drugs, prescription or otherwise, on a regular basis? If so, is there any chance of you needing them during the time of the gathering?
4. Where do you live (city/state)?
5. What is your real name (to be matched with your ID at the door and then forgotten unless you wish otherwise) and the name by which you wish to be called at the gathering?
6. Do you prefer to tickle, be tickled, both.
7. Have you ever experimented with consensual bondage?
8. Would you object to the use of bondage, either on others or yourself?
9. Have you ever tickled another person as an adult?
10. Have you ever been tickled by another person as an adult?
11. Where do you like to tickle a person most?
12. Where are you most ticklish?
13. Are there any areas people should avoid when tickling you, whether for physical or emotional reasons (IF you choose to be a lee)?
14. Are you married, involved romantically, or single? (Please note that this form should also be completed for any partner who may be planning to attend with you.)
15. If your partner is attending with you, do you foresee any difficulties with others asking for play (provided that this is done in a courteous and respectful manner)?
*NOTE: Questions # 2 & 3 are for your protection so that appropriate information can be passed along in the event of any medical emergency where you are unable to speak for yourself. This information will not be shared in any other way.
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The following is the statement that you’ll be asking folks to sign acknowledging that they have read and agree to the rules of conduct you’ll be sending them It can be sent to you along with the gathering fee.
AGREEMENT:
Please read and indicate your consent to the following agreement. Anyone, regardless of who they are, who violates these rules will immediately be confronted and, if the offense is severe or not corrected, will be asked to leave. These Rules and Regulations are taken very seriously and strictly enforced for the comfort and safety of all of our guests.
I, ____________________________________, being of legal age to attend an adult oriented gathering, agree that the information I have provided is accurate and that I will adhere to the RULES OF CONDUCT listed in the provided information. I further agree that, should I violate any of these rules, I may be asked to leave the gathering and will not be entitled to any refund of fees paid.
Some practical things we can do to assist at gatherings...
These are just a few suggestions of ways you can help out a host of another gathering. Individual hosts may have other things you can assist with as well.
- help handling the mailing list
- Help work the door
- Getting folks "badged"
- Hauling food and bevs
- Helping set up and/or clean up the gathering site
- Scene monitoring
- help to ease in newer folks who may be nervous
- One-on-one with the newies
- Pre- and Post-event coordination
- assisting with pre-event socials
- assisting with making rules known to attendees
- assisting with raffles/drawings
- being available for first aid (if trained)
- assisting with transportation for any coming from airports and bus or train stations
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